Girl Friends

Funny how strange you looked on the first day

With a name impossible for me to remember

Walked past a dozen times thinking ‘Should I smile?’

Then someday somewhere we chatted for a while.

Sat next to you in class one fine Friday in spring

Soon enough you were a funny new girl I knew

I started searching my lost stuff at your place

Names shrunk, got wild and fought over silly stuff.

But if being stupid can be fun when it’s us

If I can sleep crossed in bed with lights right on

Knowing I will have a blanket over me at dawn

You can’t just be yet another girl that I know.

If you can dare to smirk at my pretty new shirt

Can tell me I look horrible straight in my eyes

If I can kick you when you don’t hear my whines

You can’t be just another girl that sits next to me

You will never ever ever be just another girl I know!!!

First day

Everybody’s suited up in shades of black

Faking all that maturity that you lack

Responsibilities tied up to your spine

It is no longer okay for you to whine.

Strange faces and strong disapprovals

They walk about quietly like in the chapels

You know you are the one being judged

I hope it isn’t a crime to be so scared.

I might even fear the lady at the reception.

A tiny point stressed out with confusion

What should I say? ‘Hi’ or ‘Good Morning’?

I can feel the spot inside my heart burning.   

My Perfect life

Laces, Satin, silk and their pretty sheen;

Blue big eyes overdone with Maybelline

Lavender crowns and a bed of rose petals

My neck draped with long strings of pearls

Standing on the stairs with red high heels

The dream of every girl, Cinderella to me;

Yeah, I dream and I dream a lot of fairytales

But if, If a genie sprang out of the flames

Or, If fairy godmother walked out of a cloud

I, I wouldn’t be so sure to wish it out aloud.

I Eat up food, sauce smeared on my nose

Laugh out loud, write my own terrible prose 

Sing out of tune and make false promises

Fall clumsily and be far far from Perfectness.

I think I like being myself, no haughty princess,

Dorky and proud, a royal sans the dresses.

Hundred to one forever

Nine-ty Nine, Nine-ty eight…..

Usually on those late nights alone

When I twist about in bed sleepless,

Rolling my blankets into a mess

Punching pillows to be comfortable,

I counted, like my mother said,

To a hundred in my head silently

And closed my eyes to a symphony.

Seven-ty four, Seven-ty three

Lately, I am not so lucky in sleep;

My best dreams finally ditched me

They avoid me more than you do.

I decide to think of good old days

To feel my own heart lightly race,

I laugh at times we spent together

The words you said ring in my ear

I am glad that the lights are out

And that there is no one about.

Thirty six, Thirty Five…

I smile as I think when I acted a fool

It was nothing at all like acting cool

And I can never fill your gaping hole

In darkness, I laugh at my dark joke

My own breathing sounds so loud

Smiles weighed down by a rainy cloud.

I know by morn, I will be over with this

And will ‘ve forgotten all that I miss.

I watch the stars that shine over me

But cruel enough they simply won’t leave.

Five.. Four.. Three…

Once in a long while, a teardrop trickles

I try but can’t help counting in circles

Around and around, an unending maze

Till I wake up tomorrow with a stained face.

Ninety –nine, Ninety –nine…

The Caesar that didn't die!

When I look at that curved up smile,
I would've vowed to go that extra mile
If I hadn't seen the witch you were;
I know you've got a new story to share
We both know it is not for me to hear
Sorry, but I heard it loud on the street
My clenched fists have begun to bleed.
You called yourself my best 'best friend'
That you were gonna be at every bend
Said I was gonna be your bridesmaid
Now you stand behind me with a blade
I see on my mirror - you and your hate
My lips can hold swear words no more
Would've cried if I hadn't seen it sooner
I'm Caesar, I've got a Brutus in my honor.
When we break there shall be no Byes
Just you rotting alone in your twisted lies.

Thanks and sorry!

All the birthday nights I slept through
The secrets I had forgotten to keep
The promises and bonds I broke
The tears I caused but never saw
The explanations I denied a ear
The errands I refused to run about
The days I had fun when you were sick
The apologies I could never bring up
The lunches I made you wait for
The cruel jokes and the cold wars
Some I was too dumb to get
Some I could do nothing about

Some of them I cruelly meant
One small word can't make it all right
Still am SORRY for all that I did!

Bff, Just friend, loser or a sly leech
Icebreaker, clown, jerk or a sad Bitch

Doesn't matter how u'all look at me
U're the best thing that's happened to me.

Just for you to know!

If you think I would do nothing at all,

If you think your games can make me fall,

I think you should be gone before it is too late,

Or you're gonna be disappointed at your fate.

You really think you can stand up against me

Fighting the godzilla like a terrified bunny

That is what you are: stupidity and nonsense too

No better raise all that to a power two.

You say yet another clichè about how

Fate rules the world in which we live

Figures of speech, so much honey dripping

Since you can't see, I ll tell ya, you are ticking

Unbreakable locks

Every night I hope for a lucky tomorrow

That brings back things the way they were.

Doesn't matter anymore if we lost the keys

If you could shatter them all - Unbreakable locks.

The words we said have started the curse

I simply wanted to say sorry to you

Before the curse weighs us down forever!

What do I post?

Wake up late, bunk an hour

Skip a meal, rush to class

Back for lunch, try to munch,

Drag to class, Back again.

Can't get enough

I copy yesterday's page in my diary

             Ordinary lives are but a pain.

Think of plans, nothing works,

Night begins, soon it ends

Wake again for another day,

To live tomorrow the same way

Don't blame me

Life is but a boring template

             I've really got nothing to say.

Nightmare

Mirrors seemed to fail me
I felt I was looking ugly
Fate had never been more twisted
Nobody even cared if I existed
Nothing was right, I hated life
When I curled into bed yesterday.
Soon there were knives hanging
Shakily on the cracked ceiling
Slowly came the eerie breeze
I was so shaken, truly broken
Pushing tonnes on air against my chest
My ribs breaking wanting to breathe.
I wake up gasping like a lightning
Each of my muscles pulsating
Thankful that it was all in my head
Thankful for my hated sorry life.

I don't speak Cipher!

When someone speaks ghastly of me

I usually don’t care, it’s just me hating

This time though I can’t get you to see

It being you pains, it’s gotten me hurting.

I say a cliché and you take it for a cipher

Break it into pieces, calculate each one

All you want to do is prove me wrong.

It tears my heart but my trust is gone.

I know a bunch that would spin tales

But you being one of them really bugs me.

I say a thousand words, never zipped it up

I wish you knew that I never meant ‘em all

It never ll be the same, our plastered bond.

I took you for a friend who could stand me

Told you things without deep thinking

Sorry, But I would have been more careful

If I’d seen you were more like the Paparazzi.

All Indians are my...

(Voice of the north-east)


Can you hear them, silent sobs?
Gagged innocent mouths and slit tender necks
Thundering off silently in a subdued corner
Where justice is but a frivolous empty word.
Their yells for survival so cruelly quietened
By the high mountains and our apathetic walls.

Hark, you people from the mainland!
Listen to the hard breathing of humans in fear
The brothers and sisters we pledge everyday.
Nobody cares for their unaccounted deaths
Nor for their dreams that can never come true
None of us care if they are terrorized.

There, open up your humane eyes and see her
There she starves to get noticed, but in vain
Nobody sees her silent struggle for her people
To rise above the dark ocean of forced silence
To bring on themselves the reign of peace
To find themselves a way out of mere survival.

Can't you feel their beats beneath your ribs?
Praying for someone to listen, someone to see.
Fellow countrymen crying from invisible proximity
Shouting through indifference for their rightful rights.
Praying for understanding hearts from our side
To echo their voices and break those walls.

A toast to the Martyr - Mr. B

           Today as I booted up my middle-aged laptop there was a loud silence. I was 30 words down in my 101st blogpost when my ears were temporarily shut off and I began hearing a unclear resounding echo. Ten minutes into the din, my trained ears perceived it to be the wails of my unsung backspace key (Hence referred to as Bspace). Though unsuccessful at a complete translation from 'keyboard-ish' to English, I was quite able to understand the message. It said "You jerk, useless brat, keep your stinking nail-bit fingers off me!". This is the censored version of what Bspace said.

           Though my first intuitive reaction was to bring the bit gardening shovel on to B's spine, the professional in me sprung up. According to articles from the opportunities and other 'Become the leader that you are (not)' type of books, when a customer has a complaint,
          Rule number one   : Act like you understand him
          Rule number two   : Make him feel the boss
          Rule number three : Say that things are going to be okay
          The golden rule  : Never meet him again


            Going by the same order when Mr.B complained, I cried with him (for an hour). He finally gave up seeing that my wails were more horrible than his. I took a brand new tissue wiped off the dust and with pair of  neat forceps removed the ages of snacks and eraser dust that pained him. I also promised him that I would use a sanitizer before I started typing. Second mission accomplished.
           
             B had a serious complaint, he was frustrated with the way - I kept typing crap for my post, erase it all up; type my name a hundred times and remove it again (My name a hundred times seriously doesn't make a good reading); Sit there with no idea of what I was going to write about and unconsciously type down a Taylor swift song and erase it all over because I was terrified of copyrights; sometimes unconsciously played vaguely remembered Casio tunes on the QWERTY keyboard and still rub 'em off because I hadn't yet completed my post for the day.

            Oh yeah, I had the same doubt, how does my non-deliberate typing practice worry him at all. But then, I realized (quicker than you did!!) that every time I erased I fractured his plastic spine and he was tired of it. Ruthless had I been, indeed. I started to sympathize, forgot the golden rule, forgot my professionalism and cried. I decided to celebrate him and write the 101st blog post about my special backspace key.

           So, I broke his bones as i erased off the half written post (Oops) and wrote this post toasting to the one semi-martyr of the blog, Mr. B (sans the chips underneath).

The hope of tomorrow

Busy streets, What drives life?

Greed, desire or maybe joy?

Seldom is the option on the list

Rarely do we people care.

No sorry is ever said today

No promise instantly kept

The half finished dinner makes it

To the refrigerator every night.

A dying ant still guards its food

In the hope of tomorrow's lunch.

Life isn't all about today's smiles

But the hope that tomorrow comes!

Can't you see? Mom Stole it!

Sometimes when its dark at night,

Deep in my head, you glow bright,

Every such time I wonder as I look

Wrinkles! How can there be none?

I curl into a corner and think hard

Maybe it was 'coz of your kind heart:

Gandhi, Mandela and Teresa as well

They had the folds, Didn't they all?

Perhaps b'coz you were immortal?

But, The angels do magic, you just love.

It can't be 'coz of those miracle creams

None work at all, even in the dreams.

Each of us start out as bright sparklers

Losing all the light in silent crackles.

You slyly hid back your innocent charm

Spring or winter, you simply stay warm.

You gotta grow older to have the marks

You just grew and kept back the sparks.

Cunning as you are,you got me bewitched,

Sorcery it is, I gotta have myself checked.

Greedy me!

There stands desire tantalizing

With cherry blossoms at the clearing

I jump in there to make a grab

I got it now, my hands are full.

Then she moves into the sky

She waves the rainbows at me

I drop them flowers, so rapidly

Fly above and cling on tight

Colors make a gorgeous sight.

Look back down at them shreds

Of what once were bright reds.

I want the rainbows and the clouds

I want the wind, their rattling sounds

Why is it I can't have them all?

Why is it I stay the earthly soul?

Out of my dream

I did not have time to take it slow

When you told me 'its all over now'

I cried out and called you names.

You had been my pretty snow man

The summer came, you're water again

So obvious and yet hard to deal.

I felt like a small kid shivering

After Rain spoiled her evening

So rudely pulled out of a reverie.

I am happy that you cared about me once

At least I am sure it wasn't all just a trance

Now I can mourn our love's death.

We were barking up the wrong tree

From where we were it was hard to see.

I am happier than I should probably be.

I am sorry that I fussed so much

And added the tragic melodrama touch.

The truth is better than just dreams.

Where is my tiara??

----My sister is the best sister------

It feels so warm to know you are there

Like a pearl cozily held by a shiny oyster.

The way you stand up against the world

Just to make sure I don't feel un-loved,

When you smile your big smile at me,

Don't I feel like a princess already?

Oh, people are sure gonna blame you 

When I go about demanding my tiara!

I look beautiful looking in your eyes

I am not giving you up for anything nice.

Blessing!

I wake up to a half nightmare
Heaved out of my dream paradise
My lazy muscles eager to dare
To reach for that unreachable snooze.

Morning blues cloud my vision
Frustrated, my mind begins to issue
Task after task for my machine
Yet another day to pay my earthly due.

I remember the chores I have to do
Carelessly I crane to look at the clock
Look at it twice - too good to be true
Sunday it reads - The dream continues.

Blessing!

I wake up to a half nightmare
Heaved out of my dream paradise
My lazy muscles eager to dare
To reach for that unreachable snooze.

Morning blues cloud my vision
Frustrated, my mind begins to issue
Task after task for the my machine
Yet another day to pay my earthly due.

I remember the chores I have to do
Carelessly I crane to look at the clock
Look at it twice - too good to be true
Sunday it reads - The dream continues.